A Man on a Mission to Lower Suicide, Embrace Purpose, and Empower Minds - Jeff Davis is RightOffTrack

Anya Smith:

Hello, everyone. Welcome to RightOffTrack, the podcast where we dive deep into the remarkable journeys of individuals who have dared to embrace unconventional paths to success. I'm your host, Anya Smith. And today we have a truly extraordinary guest whose story and expertise will ignite your inner fire and inspire you on a journey of personal growth and success, the lines of unique values and purpose. Joining us today is Jeff Davis, an award-winning author, international keynote speaker, and mental health advocate. Referred to as the Muhammad Ali of mental health, Jeff's remarkable journey has taken him across five continents where he's been a beacon of authenticity and resilience. From his roots in Connecticut to his current home in the vibrant city of Rotterdam, Netherlands, Jeff has consistently broken barriers and shattered stereotypes. Jeff is not only a stall after expert in mental health, authentic leadership and resiliency, but he's also a TEDx speaker, Forbes contributor, and a staple of the world's Topps podcast. He's interviewed lumineers, senators, CEOs, and New York Times bestselling authors, engaged in conversations that bring to light the power of connection between mental well-being, effective leadership, and the strength to bounce back from life's challenges. With over a decade of dynamic expertise in digital marketing, Jeff possesses a daftness at crafting impactful digital campaigns that mirror his strategic mindset. and thoughtful approach to challenging stigmas and raise awareness around mental wellbeing. His journey from digital analyst to influential thought leader underscores his unwavering dedication to both realms. Jeff, beyond all that, is two times bestselling book author with his books, The Power of Authentic Leadership, activating the 13 keys to achieving prosperity through authenticity, and Reach Your Mountain Top, 10 keys to finding the hidden opportunity in your setbacks. flipping what you've heard on its head and achieving legendary goals. And all of those showcases the ability to guide others towards their unique path of triumph. So throughout this conversation, we'll delve into the fascinating intersection of mental health, leadership and resiliency and explore how those elements interwine to create a recipe for personal and professional success. Jeff's unique insights and experiences will leave you inspired and equipped to tap into your limitless potential. just as he has inspired countless individuals around the world. So whether you're seeking to enhance your leadership skills, overcome challenges, or simply embrace a more fulfilling life, stay tuned as we journey through the realms of authenticity, resilience, and the power of the human spirit. Now let's dive on in. Welcome, Jeff.

Jeff Davis:

Thank you so much for that incredible introduction. It's a pleasure to be here, and I'm really excited for our conversation today.

Anya Smith:

Oh my gosh, I am so excited. I know that just to give a little more context and how we met, we met through the Changing Work Initiative on LinkedIn, right? And there, there are a lot of amazing thought leaders, some of these business owners who have this passion of helping others. And they're like, I was like, okay, I'm gonna connect with amazing people and your title was intriguing to me. And then you were so. Like, I'm traveling, let's set up a time. Like, okay, I'm not sure what's gonna happen, but let's do it. And then we connected and I was like, oh my gosh, Jeff is amazing. You just have this authenticity, this energy, this amazing cause that I'm really excited to have you talk about. And like, then I was like, let's be friends on it. Let's be friends. I have so much to learn from you, as I hope does our audience. So thank you again for being so authentic and helping us share your wisdom today.

Jeff Davis:

My pleasure, I love our friendship and I'd love to continue doing that and like lies with the energy and also just communicating with you over the last couple of weeks has been a real joy and I love our messages and everything so it's just awesome and I'm really excited to also see where it goes in the future.

Anya Smith:

Thanks, my friend. And to give a little bit more exposure around you to our friends and audience, like where you are today is pretty remarkable. I read all the things that you've achieved, and I know you're only kind of achieving more and more. But can you give a little bit of the context? Like, how did this whole curiosity and passion for mental health start for you? And like, what steps did you actually take to go from like, oh, this is important to now being on stages around the world helping talk about this?

Jeff Davis:

Yes, yes. So the steps is a long, long journey. So where we're going to start is my why. So I'll

Anya Smith:

Yes.

Jeff Davis:

go to the core of like, what is the core fire that keeps me going when it's like two in the morning after a tough day and you're grinding, you know, we'll do that. So a couple days ago, actually, I recently turned 34 years old. So I don't know if that counts as mid thirties yet.

Anya Smith:

Happy belated birthday, woohoo!

Jeff Davis:

Thank you. Thank you. So. Let's go back in time to when I was 17 years old. So we're gonna go way back in time. And this is the core of everything. This is the core of why I care so much, why I help others. And I'll summarize it here. So there were a number of factors, but basically everyone tells you high school is the best time of your life. And due to a series of unexpected setbacks and some really bizarre occurrences, it turned out to be not the best time. In fact, some of the worst years of my life, unfortunately, I went to an all boys private high school and it was not only extremely hyper competitive, but it was a very, very unsafe environment to be in. Very, very unsafe. I'll even say this just to give context. It did not happen to me. This did not happen to me. But it came out on the news that the priests who taught at the school were sexually abusing some of the students there. Not

Anya Smith:

Oh my

Jeff Davis:

to

Anya Smith:

gosh,

Jeff Davis:

me, but to others. But I'm-

Anya Smith:

wow.

Jeff Davis:

I'm just giving context to say like, oh, not just toxic. I mean, this was really a bizarre environment to be in. I'm saying all this because my senior year of high school, I was clinically depressed. So my whole high school, I was going through and I was dealing with a number of factors. It was hyper competitive dysfunctional environment. I was getting abused in other areas of my life. I was getting severely abused. And then of course I had other unexpected setbacks through bullies and I didn't really have the self-esteem to stand up for myself. So it was like a melting pot of all these factors and I didn't have the perspective, the coping mechanisms, I didn't have the support network, all of that, I didn't have amazing people in my life like you Anya. So now I'm jumping ahead here to the core of it. This is the spring of my senior year of high school, usually in the movies, that's where you sail off into the sunset. And yeah, this is, you know, this was really bad. It was after a year of clinical depression. I'm dealing with getting severely abused. And of course I have all the, then I had these unexpected setbacks and I said, I can't take this anymore. I can't, I need to get out of this pain. I went to the garage, I actually picked up the rope. It was in the late, late evening. My family, my parents, my siblings were sleeping. And I was like, I need to get out of this depression. And no one really knew. how I was truly feeling because that safe environment wasn't provided for me. Whether it was the crazy people at my high school or whoever, I even tried to call a friend and he was completely unempathetic. I actually walked to the tree, I was about to take my own life, I was about to hang myself, I was about to end my life. And just before I did that, I got a spark of hope, like an insight, some kind of higher power from somewhere, I don't even know where it came from, and it said, Jeff put down the rope, go back to your room. And I got this, it was this amazing spark of hope in the midst of all this depression. And I put down the rope and I went back to the room. And Anya, that is the core of why I care so deeply in my heart, whether people like what I do or whether people criticize what I do, doesn't matter. I'm a fireball of helping others and caring for others because I've been in that rock bottom pit. I know what it's like for no one to care. I reached out, no one cared, people always say, oh, reach out, well, I did that, I didn't get a good response. It was brutal, it was a really, really brutal environment and time and that's why I do what I do, to help other people, that's the core of it.

Anya Smith:

Oh, definitely. Hey, I applaud you for sharing that because it's so powerful. And you know what's interesting, we just talked before as we started, like, I don't know your full story. Like we had the pleasure of talking just briefly about what you do. And like, honestly, I didn't know the full story. And like, again, it is sad. And we mentioned this, like that a lot of people know day to day somebody who took their own life. Right. Like that's a common thing. And that's tragic. Like we don't have a pandemic of success, well, no, of happiness. Like we have a pandemic of chasing success and having these goals that should make us happy, but yet everybody's on that path, seemingly working harder and harder, or just like constantly, oh, I'm busy, I'm busier. No, I'm even more busy. And yet we have this common theme where we know somebody took their own lives, or tried, right?

Jeff Davis:

Yes.

Anya Smith:

And it's tragic. And so I love that you have this not only lived experience, although it's tragic that it happened to you, but that you can provide a link of hope to somebody who is in that space and be very authentic knowing that you've been there.

Jeff Davis:

Yes, beautifully said Anya, delivering that empathy and it's breaking down stigma, it's shattering barriers. You know, a lot of people love it. I get a lot of positive responses and I'm deeply humbled and privileged to say the following. So from the bottom of my heart, this comes from a place of humility that I'm getting messages from people all around the world. Jeff, I was about to end my life and your story prevented me from dying by suicide. I get that. I've gotten that from people from all walks of life, all ages, all backgrounds, all around the world. And that's probably how I got my current nickname as well. Yeah.

Anya Smith:

Yeah, I love that. And can I add to that, if you don't mind me sharing, one thing that's interesting about that is there's so much stigma around it, around this. And I understand that, but what I mean, my grandpa, who I was really close to, I actually was born on the same day as him, he passed away. And I am the US, he's in Russia. So when he passed away, I was told that he had a heart attack, right? And he was in his 70s and he was losing his sight. So I was like, okay, well. That's obviously tragic, but kind of anticipated at that age. And then later on, I found that he actually hung himself. You know, and I can tell more of that, like it's that stigma that even people in your family don't want to shed the light of like something that happened. And I love my grandpa very deeply, but even my grandma would fight about everything, like about things that don't matter. And so I'm really, the only reason I bring this up is like, I'm really curious, What would you say to people who are going through a difficult time? Because I have sometimes get like, Oh, maybe I should have been reaching out more, you know, like maybe if I was, um, engaging more, reaching out, sharing more support, like there's something I could have done to help kind of give them more spark and hope. And I'm curious, like, do you have any learnings, any kind of advice that you give to people on both eds who maybe, uh, wish they could have done something better or kind of steep somebody struggling? If that makes sense.

Jeff Davis:

I do, I do, and I love where we're going with this conversation as well. First off, I want to say this, Anya, thank you for sharing that, that took courage to share. And I'm so sorry to hear that, that was very painful to hear. And I just wanted to say that I'm really, really sorry as far as what your grandfather experienced. And also thank you for sharing that here to add to this discussion. So that was very powerful that you shared that. So. I have several things coming to mind. So I'll start with if I'm helping someone who is in a tough space, and it could be rock bottom or just struggling. So first off, acknowledgement. This is huge. This is a huge, huge thing. It's not about jumping into giving them all sorts of solutions, and people mean well by that, but it's just acknowledging how they feel, acknowledging where they're at, listening to them as well. So that's really powerful to do. the simple act of listening can sometimes help to alleviate their suffering. Doesn't mean you'll solve their problem or take away their pain, but you can help them feel heard, acknowledged, validated and understood. And that's really, really powerful because sometimes people don't want solutions, they don't want advice, they simply wanna be heard, acknowledged and understood. So you can say comments and phrases like, I know what you mean. I understand how you feel. If I were in your shoes, I'd feel the same way. And then the other thing that this is a really important one that seeking help is a sign of strength, not a sign of weakness. It's a tremendous sign of strength to seek help. And that's something that I would also share as well. So there are professional resources out there. There healing is possible. People are there to help, whether it's a colleague, a relative, a friend, a family member, it could be a hotline. I've called a hotline before. So I advocate for this so passionately Anya, because I know there are a lot of people out there struggling, and it's important to know that you're not weak for reaching out, it's the opposite. You are so strong to reach out, that takes enormous courage, and that's very important to know, and you can heal, and there are resources available.

Anya Smith:

Yeah, and it's easy for us to say it because I can imagine, like I've had depression in my life, but it's hard to go from a point like, I don't see it getting better, right? Like that's the tipping point. Like I don't see it getting better. It's not getting better. And to have hope, like finding hope can be really challenging, right? Was there anything like, again, was there anything like, I don't know, it's a difficult subject. I'm like even struggling. How do you help somebody find the hope? Is it really just to show up or is it really just like providing this space And providing things that would be like, you know, people say, can move or physical stimulus that help them get to a place where they get feel more hopeful. I don't even know the right way to phrase that, but I hope you get what I'm saying. Like how can we help somebody get to a point where you don't feel hopeful anymore? And you are not sure how to help them see that because there's nothing you can do at some point, right?

Jeff Davis:

Yes, yeah, these are really powerful questions. So this is a very nuanced and delicate discussion and where

Anya Smith:

I

Jeff Davis:

both

Anya Smith:

hope you

Jeff Davis:

of

Anya Smith:

don't

Jeff Davis:

us

Anya Smith:

mind

Jeff Davis:

were,

Anya Smith:

we're going there. I'm trying to be

Jeff Davis:

oh,

Anya Smith:

very

Jeff Davis:

it's good.

Anya Smith:

genuine, like, yeah.

Jeff Davis:

Yeah, it's good, it's good. We're both approaching it in a very respectful way. So what I would say is that each journey is, each person's journey is different. And I'm not just saying this as some like catchphrase. I mean, I mean it literally that everyone's journey is different. It took me a long time to understand this, by the way. So I'm also talking to myself. And I'm saying this because each person's depression is different. And that's why it's so, so important to not judge others and to not judge ourselves. And this is what frustrates me to no end in this society, Anya, and what makes my blood boil, that we, it's such a judgmental society and it's hyper competitive and it can be toxic. And, and, and I'm saying all of this because we, yes, we need to be there for people. I'll acknowledge my quote role. So where am I? I'm, um, describe me as like a middle person. Like I act as a, to help the person transition to that professional resource, like a psychotherapist and a therapist or a psychologist, whoever they seeing. I'm the mental health advocate and professional speaker and the mental health expert. So I'm helping them go from being stuck in feeling alone and not reaching out for help to then crossing that bridge to talking to someone. So how I act, and this can be. also different for other advocates. I'm only speaking for myself here, is that I will talk to that person. I will take that call. Some people will tell me, Jeff, you're too generous with your time. Okay, thank you for your feedback, but you know what? I know what it's like through my lived experience to have no one care. Anya, I've had people call me up. They said, Jeff, I was about to end my life. I saw your YouTube video. uh... that while you've got balls to be sharing that uh... with the world you just save my life and i'm getting calls on the phone about that so you know i'm not saying not saying this from my ego i'm saying this because we need to desperately help other people there's a crisis here on yet in america in the world you can see how passionate i am right here because if people say all well what we talk about mental health not know we've barely scratched the surface critical depression rates are through the roof anxiety suicide rates So I'll take those calls and I will talk to them. And then, okay, due to my time and due to talking to so many people, if I've talked to them, I've either talked to them once or twice, or whether through its email or messaging, then I encourage them to reach out to the professional, to the therapist, the psychologist, the psychotherapist, et cetera, and take that next step. So that's how I help them, and I

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

will be there for them in their darkest hour.

Anya Smith:

Yeah, you know what it makes me think and again, I don't have any solution for this. Like what I see in our discussion is like when we show up and we just share genuine stories and we talk about struggles, like and my hope for this podcast was a lot lighter in the sense like I just want people to feel fulfilled. Like I want us to share the struggles so people feel like they have more fulfillment opportunities in their life that they're capable of more. But when we also talk about this very important subject, it makes me think like we need to be sharing real. hard conversations too. So people can say, hey, I see Jeff, I see people who have gone through this. And if they can recover, that gives me that sliver of hope that in that moment can be so essential. Like that can make a difference to that person. And so if you see somebody struggling, be there for them and also try to share other maybe stories like Jeff, right? Or people like Jeff or anybody that they might relate to, to get a sense of hope that that's possible.

Jeff Davis:

Yes, yes, so important to share these genuine stories and to have these conversations. And it's good to have a mix of conversations. And this is one of many fantastic conversations happening there out on in the, both in the cyberspace and also in person. So yes, I really appreciate you Anya for holding this sacred space and for approaching this topic, which does need to be discussed because of all that is happening in our world.

Anya Smith:

And if I can change the audience a little bit, again, I think in our own family, we had somebody who was having a struggle in his life and he tried to take his own life. And the people that were close to him, obviously he's doing well right now, which we're so grateful for, but it's a struggle to then be like, well, is he doing okay? And to be there showing up, especially parents and whatnot, to say, well, how do I parent now? Somebody who has maybe, we've known they've gone through this experience or like somebody close by who's struggling. How do you then like, you know, go through that challenge? Or like, how do I, am I too strict? Am I too lenient? Am I showing that support? Like, am I doing enough or too little? Like then there's becomes this balance where you think, oh my gosh, like this person who's really close to me has gone through this. Did I fail them as a parent, as a family member, whatever. what should I do now while they're, you know, they have their own life, they're an adult, they're doing what they need to be doing. Do you have any suggestion for somebody who's like, I don't know, like, am I doing whatever it is I should be doing?

Jeff Davis:

Yes, yes, I have several thoughts to share. I actually wanted to ask you, being a parent, and I admire you for all that you're able to juggle. So I do have something to share. I actually wanna ask you as a parent, how would you approach that? Because I'm not a parent, yes, I have lived experience. I don't have kids, you are a parent, and that's why I wanted to

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

ask you.

Anya Smith:

And I'm going to answer this with so much grace to like my own experience. And there are more experienced parents and that could probably speak to this better. But I have I have a one year old, a four year old and 10 year old. So for better or worse, like I'm in a place where this is not really come up. And I'm very grateful for that. But one thing I'm very mindful of is like, what's important to me is not for the children. Like people can argue, like I don't care what extra curricular activity my child goes to. I don't care about how much money they make in their life. Like a lot of, like, I don't care what they look like. I don't care what clothes they wear if they have matching socks. What does matter to me is that they go up to be resilient. And what that to me is like, I want to encourage them to try and fail and like keep persevering. I want to encourage them to learn and not be a student, but to actually focus on them learning. to knowing that failure is okay. And I know that I believe in them. I don't necessarily value what they achieve, but I value them putting up the struggle and persevering. Like that's what I'm trying to do. And I'm not saying I'm perfect at it, but those things are the things I value. And then I'm trying to show them what I'm doing and being imperfect and showing them like, what I'm trying to do is entrepreneur and learning and continuing and struggling, probably not being a perfect parent while I do all that. But that's how I choose to show up because that gives me the sense that if I'm doing this and I'm learning and I'm having a hard time, but my kids see that it's possible that you can get through that, that mom's juggling all this and still trying to show up as a good parent, they will feel like, hey, I can do more in my life and it won't be easy, but I'm not, I don't want to show them easy. I don't want to protect them from the hard things. Like I feel, sorry, this is a little bit long answer. I am actually very cognizant that I grew up in a much different reality. I grew up in Siberia in a small apartment, like two-bedroom apartment. So my expectations of what I can have are a lot different. I appreciate what I have now with a different lens of what I had then. And they're not going to have that. Their experience is going to be about parents who had a certain kind of income to their house being very different, to their going in a very privileged environment. And I worry about how does that make them, how much less struggle they're gonna have in their life because of that. And kind of like the resilience that you gain through going through some of this and having that perspective. So that's a little bit long-winded answer, but those are the things I think about that I'm very mindful of. And to me, the core focus, I want them to know I care, they're important to me, and I really want them to be learning how to challenge themselves and persevere. That's my number one focus is to raise resilient children.

Jeff Davis:

That was an amazing answer. Thank you for sharing that. I heard many things. So just a couple of the many insights you shared is like allowing them to fail, allowing them to be themselves, learning from those challenges and crafting like their own person in their own way. You wanna be, I love how you said, you were talking like, oh, whatever job or vocation or how much money they're making, whatever it is, you said that's okay as long as they're on that journey. It was really beautiful. And that... tied directly into what I wanted to share as well is that it's so important when we're giving people that space is that yeah, we're not like forcing them into a certain way or a certain box and let their journey be their journey. If they're sad, it's okay. Be sad. And our society on you, and I'm not even picking on America, it's like happens all around the world.

Anya Smith:

Yeah,

Jeff Davis:

I live

Anya Smith:

you're

Jeff Davis:

abroad.

Anya Smith:

around the world.

Jeff Davis:

Yeah. So, you know, I thought, oh, okay, maybe it's America's flaws and quirks. No, it's just as bad out here. I'm not saying America's better, I'm just saying it's just as bad out here. And people don't want to go to the root causes. They don't want to face the sadness. They don't want to, and this is what I talk about like in my resiliency talks and the mental health and the authentic leadership. We have to face these feelings. We have to open up. We have to talk about it. And it's not about blame, blaming guilt. Yes, we want to acknowledge those feelings, but I mean, at the end of the day, that won't accomplish anything to, you know, point a finger of blame. And guilt, it's okay if you feel that. Also realize, look, we're all connected and we're gonna move forward in love here, in a place of love. So it's very important to keep going with that.

Anya Smith:

Yeah. And if you don't mind me, I'm going to put it back. You talked about my point as a parent, but have you seen anything that, obviously, if you're experiencing, where, again, the parents, the family members, things that they have done well to help support somebody through these struggles? Like, or anything you would suggest?

Jeff Davis:

Yes, I'm laughing not because it's funny, more out of like an incredulous like, wow, so it's very serious. I've seen many cases, and this is very heartbreaking and also very disturbing, where parents severely, severely mess up their children. So I've seen that a lot, and it happens a lot more than people may think. I have seen cases. Actually, I had a great boss once in the workplace. And I had a great boss. We're good friends to this day. This is his real name, John, and he's just an incredible man. We're still friends. And he is a great parent to his kids. So that was great because I grew up seeing and hearing it, and not only growing up, but also just throughout my whole life of so many stories of parents ruining their kids' lives. And it's really sad. And this boss I had, he didn't judge his children. He didn't force them to be a certain way. He loved them for who they are. and he gave them room to grow and that also helped their mental health journey as well and allowed them to move forward from a place of genuine confidence.

Anya Smith:

Yeah, and if I could add to that, I believe in, I can be naive, but I do believe that parents and people are trying to do their best with what they have. And I'm not saying that in the sense of like they're perfect parents and they can be even shitty parents. But I think that when you look at it as a child, like my parents weren't perfect and I love them, like they had their flaws, like they were probably... failing not because of their inability, not because they wanted to be bad for you as a parent, because they just didn't have the resources themselves to be better. And when I

Jeff Davis:

Yes.

Anya Smith:

look at it from a sense of it was my fault or my inadequacy as a child or my inability to be valuable or important and reframe it more like people are where they are on their point in life and they're imperfect and sometimes they're shitty. And they just don't have the tools mentally, physically to show up to you to be serving you in the capacity they could be. So like don't weigh it on yourself as like your lack of value or importance or something like that. Or even like spend the time wasting them in judgment, no matter how difficult it be. And I can, I don't want to go through this like I've had really like my own challenges in my life with experiences. But instead of weighing and carrying that judgment and saying that that's what's going to define me, I'm like... I have so much more to me. And I'm gonna choose to forgive the things that happened and carry on and just let the energy of the hurt move back to the person and say, that's their challenge in life. That's their inability. That's where they are kind of like, they were limited in their capacity to show up for me and let it go there. That makes sense. That's

Jeff Davis:

Wow,

Anya Smith:

my

Jeff Davis:

that

Anya Smith:

little

Jeff Davis:

is

Anya Smith:

experience.

Jeff Davis:

so powerful. That is a golden nugget that millions need to hear. That's a mouth dropping thing. Thank you for sharing that on you. That is so powerful. And you mentioned growing up in Siberia, you're sharing this incredible wisdom of, you mentioned acknowledging the shortcomings, not holding on to the bitterness, forgiving them. My mouth is dropping. Loving this conversation, by the way, this incredible discussion. Growing up in Siberia, how was that? for you and that must have been challenging?

Anya Smith:

Yeah, no, super easy.

Jeff Davis:

No?

Anya Smith:

Like honestly, I, um, to be very transparent, like I, um, my family in Russia is amazing. They're very close in it. Um, they are like something that actually makes me resilient is that I grew up in a very close culture. So if you, Russia, you can have your own thoughts on it. And right now it's not a hot topic. Talk about it. Like, but there's a community that has learned throughout the generation to rely on the people close to it. So they may be guarded if they don't know you, they don't smile for no reason. They're very blunt, but the people that are in the network, they rely on each other because they don't rely on the political support or government. They rely on each other. So the family bond is very strong and I've always had that. And whenever I go back, my family is always there and they're incredible. My own struggle was actually with my stepdad to be very transparent. I do not have a good relationship with him. And I had really challenging times in that relationship. And so I have... I had points where I was very angry about that. I was very hurt. I carried a lot of judgment. And then I had to, to me, it's my decision to say, I'm at peace with all of it, no matter how bad it was, because it's not serving me, and there's so much more to me. And I choose, that's not my story. Like, there's so much more to me and who I am, and I just don't wanna carry the weight of it. So I choose to kind of let that return back to its source.

Jeff Davis:

Wow, I wanna share something with you. It just came to me intuitively. I'm like, I'm completely absorbed in what you're saying. It just came to me. I'm just gonna intuitively say it, being myself and letting the philosophical side of myself come out. If we heal that, if we heal those wounds on you, you have had these wounds from your experience with your stepfather that you have healed and have been healing. once we heal it, is there any more need for us to share it? And I don't mean that in a bad way, but I mean

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

like we're on this journey and I mentioned like, okay, it's not about me, it's about helping other people. I do it for others.

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

And I've been wondering this, and I'm just going to think out loud with the listeners listening to these

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

amazing things that you're that you are saying. Is there a need for us to further share it once we heal it? I'm just wondering.

Anya Smith:

I struggle with that too, because I think it's what's true to you and what you need out of it. Right? And what I mean by that is like, I admire people who do share their story because that gives other people to the voice is like, oh, that happened to me too. And like, let me support you like through your lived experience, right? You are showing that I don't think I'm quite ready for that or really like, to me where I'm at in my life, like I don't necessarily. I don't need that in my life right now. And I'm not saying that for good or bad or whatever. I'm just okay taking that experience and saying like, it's helped me define who I am more and how I approach struggle and how I approach like difficult situations with people in a certain way. And I treasure that. And also I treasure the ability to say like, that has happened and I can release some of that anger and energy. And like, I'm not saying it's easy. I'm not saying like I'm like, kumbaya. whatever, I still have my emotions, but I can come back to the sense like, are they serving me anymore? Right, and a lot of times, like there was a point in time where that was something that was really resonating with me day to day, and I don't even think about it. You know what I mean? It's nothing that cares with me day to day. So I think that whatever you choose, it's your own right judgment for you. Because I think that to your point, like what you're doing and people who choose it, they're also carrying the weight of that being something that they have to talk about in relive. And I think that that's a commitment and that's challenging. So I praise people who choose to do it because it takes courage, it takes strength, it takes energy that you're putting in day to day to sharing that truth. But I think it could also be really helpful. So I don't think there's a one size fits all. It's like, what feels right for you in your life? I think there's also different ways to do it. Like I can share my story with people one to one because I feel like that will help them in that moment. versus doing it at different levels for different reasons.

Jeff Davis:

Yes. Yeah, that's spot on.

Anya Smith:

That's mine. My little journey, so thank you for letting me share. Honestly, I feel I always want these episodes to be about the guest and like make it meaningful and not overpower of my discussion, but I hope it's helpful for anybody listening. And yeah, thank you for creating space for sharing my experience too. Well.

Jeff Davis:

My pleasure, thank you for sharing Anya. I'm loving this. I've been, as you mentioned, I've been on many, many podcasts always to help others and spread these messages and I'm loving what a great back and forth dialogue it is. I mean all the podcasts I've been on are great. Nothing bad to say there. I just,

Anya Smith:

Of course.

Jeff Davis:

I find this especially enjoyable and

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

unique because then I can ask you questions and we can both

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

learn from each other and that's how I do it. I'm always learning from everyone. I'm honored

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

you're sharing all this and I'm learning

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

as well.

Anya Smith:

Can I share? And actually, I'm going to go into a slightly different subject and we can come back to this, because like one thing that you touched on and actually been holding in the back of my mind is like you mentioned that point where you were thinking about taking your life and there was a point of hope that came and I'm not I'm not religious, but I am spiritual. And to me, like that would be a sign of that. And I don't I am not necessarily asking you the point of like, how do you take that? But Mike, I'm curious what happened from that point? from the point of having this element of hope to then like, what did that journey look like to where you are now? Whereas like, wow, what a transformation. But can you maybe share like, what was that initial process of like finding a little bit of hope and then nurturing that?

Jeff Davis:

Yes, I am very spiritual as well. I'm not religious but spiritual. So, so we, I, we, I feel like we're on the same wavelength. I just felt that way when we

Anya Smith:

I

Jeff Davis:

were

Anya Smith:

know!

Jeff Davis:

talking or when we're on the same wavelength. So it's a, it's a really good connection here. So after I put the rope down, I went back to my room and I went into a deep guided meditation. And then, and I do, I have no connection to this person. I don't, I don't know her. It was, it was a guided meditation by a woman named Kelly Howell called Awakening Kundalini. There's also intro tracks that explain to you how to do the breathing exercises. And I'll leave that for anyone to look up. And at the very near the very end of the meditation, I'm laying there. This is after all these depression and all these setbacks and everything. And I went into an indescribable energy field. There are no words to describe what happened. But she says in the guide of meditation, merging. with the source of creation. By the way, this is on YouTube, so you can hear this near the end. And it wasn't outer body, like I didn't fly out of my body. I'm not exaggerating here. I'm being very careful with my words. I've shared this a lot, so I know how to say it. And I'm true to what happened. I couldn't feel my body anymore. I wasn't out of the body, but I was in an energy field. And in that energy field, I realized your self-worth doesn't depend on external circumstances. And that's what no one taught me. not a coach or a guidance counselor or a cruel classmate or even friends or family. I never learned that from anyone, but I realized on my own in this energy field, your self-worth doesn't depend on external circumstances. So that's a core message that I share with the world. Pull your self-worth away from society, away from outer aspects of success, and find your inner strength in you because your self-worth is infinite. And that's what I realized. in this energy field in my room.

Anya Smith:

I think that's so powerful and people can listen and have different ideas and judgments around that. That's okay. Because I feel like I do think there's more to this world than like what we see. And I think there's miracles happening every day. And I think like that's a little miracle that you're describing. And obviously, and look at you now, like you can have whatever judgment, because like, oh, Jeff, whatever, you know, you had some funky coffee, whatever. But like, but look where that took you, regardless of what you believe about, like where that... feeling came from, was it whatever, was it meaningful or not to their idea? Like, look what you're doing now and it's helping, you know? So and question, like, did you meditate before this experience?

Jeff Davis:

was getting into it.

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

Yes, I did meditate. I was getting into it.

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

I this one meditation I had I've never had anything like that before and I'm

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

just gonna say this really quickly by the way because I don't like it when other people do this when I share this is my experience I would never put like my beliefs on to somebody else

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

so when I share this is not trying to convince anyone of anything it's simply like oh here's what happened what universal truths and insights can I take that will benefit everyone so So that's

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

where I come from with it. So yeah, I did have some meditation experience, but nothing like what I experienced in it.

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

The depression acted as a gateway to spiritual awakening and even enlightenment.

Anya Smith:

That's amazing. No, I appreciate your sharing so people can make their own judgment, find whatever resonates with them, but just have a perspective to listen and hear what happened. You know what's interesting to me, like sometimes I'm not good at meditating, but I do really appreciate it. And what I found in it was like, well, what drew me to mindfulness, if you don't mind us talking about that for a moment, is like, I found a really strong frustration of what is not working. And that's the theme of this podcast and why I do this because like my success path is not working, the goals that are endless and never satisfying are not working, you get to a point where you have certain amount of money and I'm grateful for that and like, I have everything on paper that should be happy of, but I'm always stressed out like that can't be working. And it's also terrifying sometimes where everything these things society is telling you to do and to get doesn't bring you last and happiness. And that's why I think there's also people who are insanely rich. and famous and whatnot, everything that we aspire to, who commit suicide, who don't see joy in life. And like, wow, what happened? Like that person had everything because that in itself doesn't make you happy. And it could be very scary and even depressing. But also if you flip it, it's like, well, if that's not the solution, what is? And that's where the internal work can be frustrating and not easy. but also give you a glimmer of hope because you said it's like, well, if the solution really doesn't come on how much money I make or something in the future, but can really start with right now, me acknowledging what is important to me. Like really, what is important to me? What makes me come alive? What is making this time valuable? And focusing more on that exploration and that journey and realizing like it's all kind of, it's all in my head. Like how we see the world is, starts with everything that's in our head. that's

Jeff Davis:

Yes.

Anya Smith:

kind of where I pursued it. And sometimes I like this meditation where I just imagine the stars being out in the universe and quieting my sense of existence. Like, you know, like you do, like, I don't have a name. I just like the universe. And it kind of equates me to this, we're going way off topic, to this quiet sense of what death would look like for me. Like, if I just didn't exist, it's something that we fear about, like, oh, I'm gonna die. But really imagine being out in the universe, being the star, just like quieting my mind of might. presence of like my name, what I'm doing, and it's actually calm. Like if there is nothing but a black void and you're just in it, there's nothing to, there's nothing to stress about. You're not trying to be a certain size, certain weight, have a certain nose, whatever, a certain title, and you just kind of like, you're at peace. And I don't know, that calms me down sometimes about like, hey, what am I really chasing? Like getting back to just a little state of quiet and peace. And then, yeah, completely off topic, but the sense of mindfulness really brings me a little bit of peace in everything I do and it gives me a sense of, well, what is my purpose? And realigning it to how do I want to live versus letting the external noise shape that. And as you can tell, I'm a very intense, very action-oriented person, so if I can find that space for reflection, you can too.

Jeff Davis:

Yes. Very inspiring. I love your imagination, your meditation. Like you said, it's peace. In our society, a lot of people fear death. And I say that respectfully, by the way. I'm saying that out of empathy. So that's not a judgment. That's simply an observation. And I love your thought. I believe, by the way, and it's okay if someone disagrees with me on this. I believe

Anya Smith:

Hmm.

Jeff Davis:

we're all one. I

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

believe it looks like we're separate, but really, and I don't just mean connected. In my... view of the world and by the way friends disagree with me on this and that's okay that's a

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

healthy little debate there I truly believe in my heart there is no separation between you and another it's one infinite source and that also gives me peace and everything we see is an illusion whether it's failure or success or whether you're underweight or overweight or whether you're tall or short or left or right or diagonal it's in the end we're all one

Anya Smith:

Yeah. And you know what I love about that? Like that there's a metaphysical connection to that thought, right? Like you can pick, Oh, Taffania, you guys are out there. But like

Jeff Davis:

Yeah.

Anya Smith:

if you look at mental physics, right, then we talk about that on a tiny level, we're all atoms that

Jeff Davis:

Yes.

Anya Smith:

are the same. And then you go even down the strength theory, which gets a little crazier than that. Right. But on a molecular level, we are all the same. So there's something amazing. Like if you really get curious about it, it's like actually We are physically all the same at a very like essential level. And there's beauty to that, right? So when we think about how do we treat others, what we put out in the world, when you are competing with somebody else, when you are judging somebody else, when you're being mean to yourself, you're hindering others and yourself. Right? Like, so if you're judging

Jeff Davis:

Yes.

Anya Smith:

somebody, like you're actually hurting yourself. You're like

Jeff Davis:

Yes.

Anya Smith:

by hurting the universe, you're bringing something negative. And but the opposite is true too. When you're helping somebody else. when you're challenging your own negative preconceptions about your abilities, you're building up the world and yourself.

Jeff Davis:

love that, love that. It sounds like we both have a very keen and strong inner philosopher

Anya Smith:

Our

Jeff Davis:

in

Anya Smith:

guests

Jeff Davis:

us.

Anya Smith:

are like, oh gosh, Anya and Jeff, okay, fine.

Jeff Davis:

Yeah.

Anya Smith:

We get your in alignment. But okay, I'm gonna switch topic a little bit, if you don't mind, because the other thing of this podcast, I'm also want to share the struggles that happen on your professional journey. I love this discussion and I hope people are finding something helpful wherever you are in your journey. And if you're struggling, hear me. perfectly sincerely, like if I can be of any help, if Jeff can be any help, please reach out to us. Like we really do care and if you're listening in that point in life, like please take that moment, reach out to us, we will just be whatever we can be in that moment. So I wanna take a pause for that. But then one thing I also wanted to talk about is like, you've done all these remarkable things in your life. Being an author, talking around the world, could you share about your experience like, gaining that confidence and like the learnings along the way that maybe you can offer to us too.

Jeff Davis:

Yes, well, it was a very long journey. And I don't mean that as some cheesy play on words. So the first thing I'm gonna say right off the bat is play the long game. That's been my experience. And I felt that not achieving that success right away, but it being like a very slow, slow climb. And not just, I didn't want to say the word steady because it's like constantly like up and down, but gradually going up as it constantly goes up and down. So it was a grind Anya. I believe I told you this offline and I'm going to share this openly to help whoever may be listening if you're facing challenges doing your own thing. Years and years of doing this for free and speaking for free and I finally had my fee skyrocket after being in the game for like nine years. Nine

Anya Smith:

Mm-hmm.

Jeff Davis:

years is a long time to do what you love without getting paid for. I did get paid. I gave a TEDx in New York City in 2015. So there I had a few speeches hot off the TEDx and then it kind of fell off again. And then last year in 2022, then my speaking business exploded and I was speaking all around the world. So the one big lesson I want to share right off the bat is be patient, play the long game. I don't mean that in any way whatsoever as some kind of play on words. I mean, that was the truth of my journey. And I want to share that because our society is very, very much a shortcut society. It's like, what can we do to just take a shortcut? Well, there are no shortcuts. You've got to put in the work. And I know that. You know not everyone wants to hear that but oh what a journey the YouTube videos Hundreds of blog posts being guest featured being on hundreds of podcasts traveling the conferences around the world Constantly interviewing people Non-stop content thousands and thousands of social media posts across every social media channel you can imagine I haven't even scratched the surface. I've written three

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

books I'm saying all this because this was all the engine the content that built that Empire to become a thought leader in authentic leadership, mental health and resiliency, those three core pillars. So there's a long story made as short as I could.

Anya Smith:

Why? We have time.

Jeff Davis:

Yeah.

Anya Smith:

We're good. I love this. And so much to learn. And again, we're not going to capture all in the podcast, which like you're just going to have to follow Jeff and reach out to him and connect with him and look at all his features because there's so much there. But the other thing I wanted to mention is like you're also working on your next book right now, right? So beyond everything you've done, you also have like some exciting stuff happening in the future, right? Can you share a little bit about what's to come? And like what's your big scary

Jeff Davis:

Yeah, so I am working on a book, on my fourth book. It's called The End of Workplace Dysfunction. And then the subtitle is Transform and Break Free from Toxic Work Cultures Through Authentic Leadership. And I've been working

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

on it for a couple of years now. It's going well, I'm making steady progress. I'm right near the end of writing it, so it's going really well. And I'm really helping workplaces foster psychological safety, creating cultures of trust, employee retention, improve employee satisfaction. engagement, all of that, ultimately a better bottom line and doing that through better mental health, better authentic leadership and reducing and preventing burnout. So there's a lot there.

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

But I'd say the big hairy audacious goal I have, I would have to say that ever since I was in elementary school, I had always wanted to become a New York Times bestseller. And I've hit the Amazon bestseller. So I hit the Amazon. But I'd love to hit the New York Times. It's very hard to do, so there's no

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

guarantees. I'm not attached to it. I'm just saying that would be a really cool goal.

Anya Smith:

I believe in you. Like if there was a cause

Jeff Davis:

Oh, thank you.

Anya Smith:

that needs to be on the, on your side, like let's make it happen. Like all the audience, like, like share some love for Jeff as it's coming out, keep us posted and we'll just keep promoting and have you back and do a whole episode on that as we prepare for it, just to share your more love.

Jeff Davis:

Love it, love it.

Anya Smith:

One thing I was actually like, I had a question, you could see me suffering a little bit like, oh, what was it? So one thing when we talked, if you don't mind me sharing, and we can edit out if you do, you mentioned like, hey, I'm doing all this stuff, but I still feel anxious and I can get that. Like I love what I'm doing and I still feel like self doubt and anxiety, like, what am I doing? But can you share like, how are you doing all of this? And then like facing self doubt, staying motivated, those are challenges, right? We don't talk about it, but especially when you play the long game. you have to confront those challenging feelings and stay motivated somehow. Can you share how you were able to do all of that and maybe big challenges and kind of pivot to learning along the way for that?

Jeff Davis:

Yes, yes. I had all of that and even more. I had all of that and I'm emphasizing that because wow, did I have some tough nights and I'm gonna share this before I go into my answer. in I mentioned, so I started speaking professionally in 2013. And then I kind of got my plane off the ground, metaphorically speaking in 2015 to 2016. And then 2017 through 2021, it like, I was still putting out content, but I wasn't really getting as many requests. It actually hit a point where it blanked out. I'm being, I'm being very open right here. And I'm saying this because I was venting to friends over coffee, over beers, over, over phone, over phone calls on my phone. I was venting and I'm just going to own it. I'm not going to hide it. I'm going to be transparent. I was venting and I said, I'm mad at life. I put in all this work. How is this not taking off of doing everything right? So I was impatient. You know the saying, we teach others what we need to most learn ourselves. And I'm saying to everyone, be

Anya Smith:

Yes.

Jeff Davis:

patient. Well I'm not exactly the most patient person. I hope I demonstrated some vulnerability there because I can kind of laugh at my own quirks. I had a lot, I was banging my head against the wall. People were supportive, many were, some weren't, but many were, and I have a lot of venting there. So I have a part two to answer, by the way. I filed it in my mind, I have more to say, but I'm curious if you wanna react to that first.

Anya Smith:

I love that you're real. Like

Jeff Davis:

Yeah.

Anya Smith:

that's what I love. Like what I love about humans is like the beauty that happens with authenticity. And like when you embrace your authenticity, I have, I give myself freedom to do the same, right? Like our listeners could be like, well, if Jeff can do like, why can't I? Like, why can't we have these real discussions and know that if we're doing something, even if it's like learning and growing in, we are now seen as leaders or kind of whatever, developing us, like, that doesn't mean like we have our shit together all the time. That means we're still humans and we're still failing. And that doesn't make it a sign of us even going back or like not being on track, whatever that means. It just means like that's part of the process. Like we need to talk about that challenge and setbacks are again, there's no straight line to success. It's always just a human experience that we're learning and trying to get better from.

Jeff Davis:

Yes, and I'm just going to add something really quick and then I'll go into it is that, and I'm just owning it what you just said and I encourage others to do this as well and I hope that's one of the takeaways is that I also sometimes can be insecure. I can be insecure. The stem of it comes from these really wacky and bizarre experiences I had in my schools, especially high school and even college, and I had other bizarre experiences and other aspects of my life as well at home. So I... I know the root cause, I am healing that. I all, you know, a lot of people tell me, Jeff, stop being so insecure. And I just sometimes have this. So I wanna say this because now I'm gonna go into the part I wanted to share that if you're having that, if you're listening, if you feel anxious or insecure or whatever it is you're struggling with, it's actually a good thing. And I do not mean this in a falsely positive way. I'll explain why. Brian Tracy is one of the greatest authors of all time. He's a professional speaker. He's endorsed one of my books He says something I love if you're not doubting yourself at least four nights per week You're not putting yourself out there enough and Anya I felt like a light bulb went off Like I always thought like what's wrong with me? I'm always doubting myself And I really hope this will be a light bulb moment for the viewers as I pull in Brian Tracy's wisdom into this discussion Because I've applied it in my own life, and that's why I'm sharing it. I was like, oh like like my mouth dropped open, my eyes went wide. Whoa, doubt isn't a bad thing. Doubt actually means we're challenging our barriers. We're pushing the comfort zone. We're growing, we're evolving. We're trying, we're experimenting. We might fail, we might make mistakes. That's okay because

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

even if you're making mistakes, you're way ahead of someone who isn't trying at all. So

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

I'm saying all this because... first of all, realize you might be doing better than you think, but your inner critic and your demons are putting you down more. This was a huge point in my journey where I always thought I was sort of like, not doing well. And then people always said, Jeff, you're doing great. Jeff, you're out there. And I'm like, oh, well, I'm not really getting booked to speak as much as I wanna. Jeff, you're crushing it. And I'm like, is this in my head? So I'm saying this because embrace the doubt. If you're having doubt, it might actually mean you're moving the ball forward.

Anya Smith:

Yeah, you know, and again, this is my experience. Like I have doubt all the time. That's funny. The other day, I'm new to TikTok, but I'm trying it, right? And somebody was telling me, Anya, maybe your algorithm is wrong, because like I just started, and when I see just like on the blanket, it's just like people like farting and dancing and

Jeff Davis:

Yeah.

Anya Smith:

like doing stuff. I'm like, that's never gonna be content I'm kind of appealed to. Like you just have to like look through. So I went in there, I was like, okay, topic that I'm interested is like entrepreneurs, like female entrepreneurs. So I went on that.

Jeff Davis:

Yes.

Anya Smith:

And what I saw, like no offense to anybody, is like very like glamorized versions of like female entrepreneurs. And I didn't love that because like, is that really what a female entrepreneur needs to be is like a very sexified version of herself that needs to always look pretty and that's what it means. I don't know. It was sad to me and then it was like, oh well, that's not what my that's not how I look. That's not what I want this to be about. And it's like you have those self-doubts. But then like, that's okay, you know, I can still build my own version of what I want to do. It can look different from what other people are doing and there's again, it's not good or bad. I'm not trying to have a judgment like they look amazing and stellar, but that's not my story or how I want to be a female entrepreneur or what that would look like for me. The self doubt is like constant and everything we're doing and I've never felt more alive though, while I'm doing this. And I don't have it all figured out, but I'm like, oh. this feels so much more right and true to me because at least I'm conscious of like, what is this work that I'm doing? What purpose is this serving? Is it fulfilling me in a way that actually serves my strengths versus just, you know, following whatever is out there like that people have to tell me what I should be doing and what I'm good at, what I'm not good at and kind of framing my work around that. So yeah, it's definitely the most challenging thing I've done. besides parenting,

Jeff Davis:

Yeah.

Anya Smith:

and the most rewarding thing I've done. And it has constant self doubt. And the one thing I've learned from my short experience of just talking to incredible people, like he was like, the people that are most successful aren't doing it just because they have no doubt or sense of failure. They're doing it through doubt and through embracing failure and getting a lot more comfortable of those two things constantly.

Jeff Davis:

Yes, yes, I love that on you so much. I had the same experience you've had on TikTok on Instagram. I find Instagram, they glorify the entrepreneurial life and it left a bit of distaste in my mouth, to be honest with you, because I found the entrepreneurial life to be really challenging and I found it to be a grind. By the way, it's worth it. So

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

I'm not saying this to deter someone from that path because in the end, I've never felt more alive just like you. So... I'm saying this because on Instagram and on other social media platforms as well, they glorify us. I really, really related to you. We don't need to be all perfect like society says we have to be. We could also be real. I use Instagram to show my behind the scenes. I spoke this morning on a virtual speech and the host said, everyone was listening, and he said, and he's a very open guy, and he said, Jeff. Never in my life have I ever seen someone be so open, honest, and transparent on social media and he said, I've never seen anything like it. I'm saying this because screw the society that tells us we have to be fake. Screw it. I do not agree. We be ourselves and we become successful by being even more of ourselves.

Anya Smith:

Yeah, and the right audience finds you. Like that's the thing, like the right people will resonate. And I just truly believe like people crave that. If all the falseness, the illusionary success, the thing that doesn't actually fulfill us, like people are craving something like, oh my gosh, like thank you for being genuine. Thank you for giving me permission to do the same. Thank you for like not looking perfect. And all that and I struggle with that too. I'm like, okay Well, I put on lipstick and like mascara for this right like there's definitely an ego part of it But I'm also like, oh, you know, like I don't want to try so hard where it's I'm completely different person Trying to make this and saying like be authentic and be true to yourself right,

Jeff Davis:

Yes.

Anya Smith:

like this is definitely a struggle and like I think what we're doing having this discussions hopefully gives all of our amazing audience members the permission to be you because you are incredible and you're capable of so much and Yeah, I always believe we're capable of so much more than what we think is possible right now.

Jeff Davis:

Yes, 100%.

Anya Smith:

This is so fun. I knew this was going to be incredible. I was like, oh my gosh, I've I worked long days for my own account I was like, I'm a little bit tired But I was like this is gonna be so fun because Jeff and I just have been great having great conversations on WhatsApp can we touch on one area that we had no conversation around? And

Jeff Davis:

Yeah, go ahead. Yeah, definitely.

Anya Smith:

I was like I actually messaged you the other day like oh my gosh, Jeff Like you're also a powerhouse in digital

Jeff Davis:

Yeah.

Anya Smith:

marketing

Jeff Davis:

Why? Yeah.

Anya Smith:

analytics no clue because you don't even mention it right but that's really interesting it how well how did you grow your expertise there and like how are you using it around your work if there's an intersection

Jeff Davis:

Yes. So this is very interesting. So I mentioned I grew over time my speaking business. We've talked about that on the podcast. So that was my side hustle, which grew bigger, bigger and bigger until it became my main thing. While growing this side hustle, I had my backbone of digital marketing, which I did by working jobs and doing contracting

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

and doing consulting. So it's something I actually love. Actually, even before digital marketing, I started out in finance and Finance, I found, wasn't really for me as much. So then I went to the digital marketing side of things. So I quickly reinvented myself. So that's actually a piece of encouragement I have for the listener to reinvent yourself and don't be afraid to do that as well. So my digital marketing expertise is the SEA, which is the pay-per-click, the paid ads, the SEO, both the technical and the content side of things, the social media, both paid and organic, and then digital analytics. and all the analytics platforms as well. And I did all those things and more for the jobs I worked. And that actually allowed me to market myself better as a writer and a speaker. Why did my third book become a bestseller in the competitive category of business mentoring and coaching on Amazon? Because of my digital marketing skills doing Facebook ads, for example. I'm saying this because I was able to merge it. Like I used to think, oh, it's separate. And then I merged it, but it was really hard. I didn't get there right away. And kind of people were like, Jeff, you're a writer, you're a speaker, you're a digital marketer. Like I'm an anomaly. I own being an anomaly.

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

I've done a lot of things. I wear many caps. I'm not gonna hide that. I'm not gonna be embarrassed about it. I merged it all together. And that's how I got to where I am.

Anya Smith:

And I applaud you for like sincerely from the bottom of my heart because people keep telling me, Anya, if only you could narrow down your focus on the one thing, then you'd be amazing. And I get where they're coming from. Like that makes sense on paper, but I have so many passions and ideas. Right. Like, and they kind of like, I'm not saying that that's a good or bad thing, but I want to do different things and I have different skills. I'm trying to build it out because I see a unison of value that they bring together. Right. And sometimes it does stretch me thin and I know I need to learn. more barriers around the book, you give me that encouragement. It's like, it's okay to have different things that bring you life. It's okay to have different skill sets because I believe like when you have different versatile skill sets, they will bring you energy and kind of resources and strength when

Jeff Davis:

Yeah.

Anya Smith:

other areas are lacking. They'll kind of counterbalance you sometimes like when you're learning something new or you're making money in one area or that versatility isn't necessarily a drawback. That's just how our brains work. And like, don't feel like you have to change because somebody else like, I, you really should just do X. Like, well, I think you know you. You know, you know yourself better. And if something's telling you, I want to do more, do more, explore it and find it.

Jeff Davis:

Anya, I'm getting goosebumps, I mean that sincerely. Anya, I cannot even tell you how many people have disagreed with me on this. And I am so passionate about, you know, do what works for you, so if that works for someone. But if you have several areas that you're good at, do it. And I've done a LinkedIn post on this, I've done blog posts, I've been talking about this. I built my confidence up in it as well. And it pisses some people off. Some people live and die by the, you have to have a niche. And I'm not trying to prove them wrong. You know, if they found, you know, quote, riches in the niche is good for you. I'm not trying to prove them wrong, but then there's a TED Talk out there about like how actually some people like you and I, Anya, were wired differently. And we actually do better by talking about multiple things. The caveat is I would never, ever tell someone to talk about something they don't know about. They don't know

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

something about. Do what you know and what you have expertise in. But if it's in multiple areas, why limited? That's

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

my most expert opinion. I've done research on it. I also have a lot of case studies of people who have succeeded doing the approach that we're talking about. So I've advanced the discussion because seven years ago, I would have been like, well, Anya, so many of you disagree with me. And I'm like, no, I'm gonna be myself. I'm gonna own it. I've done my research. I've talked to really top players

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

who succeeded and a lot of people disagree, but a lot of people agree. So I wanted to share that context

Anya Smith:

Yeah,

Jeff Davis:

there.

Anya Smith:

yeah,

Jeff Davis:

Yeah.

Anya Smith:

again, fine. I'm gonna conclude it symbolically, I'll wrap up because I know we're going long. But like, the thing is, is that there are so many voices in the world. And you need to create space and there's power to find what serves you. And like they say, the science of true intelligence is to be able to receive the information out there and not take it all in. Like not find, make it your own truth. Like that's the power, like find what's unique to you because... With billions of people, can you imagine if you listen to a billion people's opinions of you and what you should be doing? That's ridiculous. But we're literally find that to be like, that's normal. Like I should listen to everybody as if they know your truth better than you do. Like trust your intuition, reflect on what's working for you. Even if it's like if it's not working for you, that's the experience too. And also you have to start somewhere. Like if you're not expert at something, don't make it like, oh, if I want to explore this and I'm not good at it, no, right now, like I should never bother. Right? Like I switched careers like 30, 31, 32, 32 ish. I went to the business analytics and that was not my background. And I was like, well, I never did tech, but I went back to school and did it. And I learned like the power of learning and persevering. And like that opened up my mind about what

Jeff Davis:

Yes.

Anya Smith:

I can do. But like, again, listen to what's true to you, embrace things that you have curiosities around to find if it's true, truly worth it or not, but don't limit yourself. Like there's great power and standing up for yourself and defining your own. narrative in the world instead of listening to everybody else. Anywho, that's a lot.

Jeff Davis:

Wow,

Anya Smith:

We need

Jeff Davis:

this

Anya Smith:

to

Jeff Davis:

is

Anya Smith:

do another

Jeff Davis:

gold.

Anya Smith:

episode.

Jeff Davis:

We need to do a tape. I have a feeling we need to, you know, all the things we did, there's even more questions I wanna ask, but you know, we'll save that for the next episode.

Anya Smith:

Yes,

Jeff Davis:

This

Anya Smith:

yeah.

Jeff Davis:

is gold. I'm gonna share this with a lot of people because this is gold. This is something I hope, and I mean this in a sincere way, out of adding value. I hope people will listen and share because this is what it's all about, being ourselves.

Anya Smith:

Yeah.

Jeff Davis:

owning your truth, whatever your truth is.

Anya Smith:

Yeah, and I know there's a lot we didn't mention, but for this episode right now, is there anything else you wanna add before we conclude with three short bit questions?

Jeff Davis:

We talked about a lot of the things. I had also gone through a lot of the wonderful questions you had prepared, and I know we weave that in very beautifully. The one thing I'll just add in is that I also find that weaving and I've also talked about this in certain things I've done, weaving in empathy as well for ourselves and others and having that empathy. And then when we're on our own journey and owning that own journey, realizing It is okay to go off track and go your own way and having empathy for ourselves, instead of being our own critic and instead of taking in those, all those opinions that don't apply to you, you know, having that empathy can be really important both for others and also yourself. And that's something that is a key thread as well.

Anya Smith:

Oh, this is awesome, my friend. I appreciate you. Like, I honestly can be very transparent for you. Thinking about this conversation going live, like, also makes me a little bit nervous, but like, I'm still gonna do it, right? Because I think that when we reflect like, oh, I said things that were really authentic, oh,

Jeff Davis:

Yes.

Anya Smith:

like, fuck it, let's do it. That's my approach. Like, I'm like, oh, you know, that I don't know how I feel about that. I'm like, let's do it. Because the world deserves that. Let's be that, let's be those people who are like, even though it might be uncomfortable and sensitive. Hopefully that will help others and that makes it worth it.

Jeff Davis:

You showed up very bravely and courageously on you and I give

Anya Smith:

So

Jeff Davis:

you credit

Anya Smith:

did you.

Jeff Davis:

for that.

Anya Smith:

High five, my friend. Like

Jeff Davis:

High

Anya Smith:

high

Jeff Davis:

five.

Anya Smith:

five, high five right there. Okay, we will wrap up, my dear audience. I know you have things to do, although I'm sure you're enjoying this just as I am. So we have three short bit questions whenever you're ready, and then we will conclude this wonderful piece.

Jeff Davis:

I'm ready.

Anya Smith:

Okay. My favorite place to travel right now is...

Jeff Davis:

My favorite place to travel right now is Budapest, Hungary. I've lived there for a full calendar year when I did a study abroad experience more than a decade ago. And the beautiful Danube River cuts the city in half and you've got the beautiful Buda side and the hills and then the downtown pest side. I just have a sweet spot for Budapest. I go there every now and then and I just love the city.

Anya Smith:

That sounds amazing. I miss traveling. Okay, won't go off topic too much there. Okay, is there like one pre-speaking engagement, like ritual that you have that helps you calm your nerves?

Jeff Davis:

Yes, I have several. I will use one that I do visualization. I'll do visualization where I assume the feeling. So not imagining that the feeling will come, but I assume the feeling in the present moment. So

Anya Smith:

Hmm.

Jeff Davis:

not only visualizing, but feeling the feeling of connecting with the audience and making eye contact and adding value and feeling good in myself and imagining the audience members reacting well. And then, oh, when I'm done talking, I can imagine. people coming up to me and I had a big event last year. I was the headline keynote speaker at an event and it happened just like I imagined it and I was done and someone came up to me and it was incredible. So visualization, I'm not saying that will guarantee the outcome but it will increase the likelihood that what you desire will come true. It's a very healthy practice and just make sure to mix your visualization with a very, very healthy and dedicated sense of preparation as well.

Anya Smith:

Love it. Okay. Again, my audience knows I'm improvising a little bit. They heard other short-fit questions, but I'm loving this. Okay, last one, which is actually on topic. In a positive sense, going off track is...

Jeff Davis:

in a positive sense, going off track is having your life go a direction that you never imagined or expected or thought would happen. And in doing so, you learn and grow more than you ever thought possible.

Anya Smith:

this. Amazing. Like I, I didn't, I don't go into these episodes of any expectations. I'm just hoping to share your story with respect, with as much love as I can and kind of get the best experience for the audience so they can hear your wisdom and resonate with it as best as possible. And I think I'm really feeling like this was really awesome. I'm hoping the audience and members agree and I look forward to any kind of questions and comments you guys have. Please feel share those with us. I love seeing all the feedback, all the questions that you have. Jeff, anything you wanna add to the audience before we let them go?

Jeff Davis:

like to remind you that your self-worth is infinite. It doesn't depend on external circumstances. Remember that you have value regardless of what others say and just connect with your truth. Listen to the thoughts and feedback that resonate and don't be afraid to discard the stuff that doesn't resonate and move forward ahead confidently to the direction of your dreams even when you have those doubts and even when you when you have other things keep going.

Anya Smith:

Love it. And where should people find you? You're on LinkedIn, that's how I found you. So you have a website, where should people work with you, connect with you?

Jeff Davis:

Yeah, so my website would be jeffdespeaks.com. That's my first name, J-E-F-F, the letter D, and then speaks plural, jeffdespeaks.com. Feel free to send me an email, and I'll be sure to email back and respond. So my email is jeff at jeffdespeaks.com. I'm also active on LinkedIn. LinkedIn is probably the social media platform I'm active on the most. So you can find me at linkedin.com, and my username on there is Speaker Jeff Davis. And then I'm on the. the other social media channels as well, whether that be Instagram, Facebook, et cetera. And I'm on many others as well. My blog is active

Anya Smith:

Ha ha

Jeff Davis:

with

Anya Smith:

ha!

Jeff Davis:

lots of free great content. And I also

Anya Smith:

Cool.

Jeff Davis:

have lots of free great content on my YouTube channel as well at author

Anya Smith:

Okay,

Jeff Davis:

Jeff Davis.

Anya Smith:

love it. I'll tag all of that so you can just connect with Jeff,

Jeff Davis:

Yeah.

Anya Smith:

and connect with him because he's an amazing human being as you can tell. Well, everybody, I so appreciate your time. Thank you so much for coming to another Ride Off Track adventure with us. We look forward to having you join next time. Take care.