How You're Guaranteeing Failure in Life... And What to Do About It - Gagan Gupta is RightOffTrack | Anya Smith

problem is we always overthink too much
we choose unhappiness over uncertainty
now what does that mean
it means that we are so comfortable with failure
because we know what it looks like most of us
I'm saying most of us are so comfortable with failure
because our mind
that has 65 million years of evolution tells us
to remain safe
remain safe means doing what we do or what we know
but that also means not trying new things
which also means that you're never gonna try something
you're uncertain at
which means that failure is guaranteed
so is unhappiness
so we choose fear of failure over fear of uncertainty
and self doubt whispers uncertainty
and it creates in the moment
what looks less frightening is to choose unhappiness
meaning let's not do anything
and it causes paralysis
and paralysis means it's guaranteed failure
all of this means you might as well give it a shot
and try because you will succeed
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enjoy this episode
going off track is taking a chance in yourself
following your poles of curiosity
it's making your own decisions
the most wonderful adventure
hey friends
Anya Smith here
today's podcast is all about conquering self doubt
embracing abundance
and revitalizing your mindset
will dive into a powerful story of transformation
from the brink of the spirit
to becoming a beacon of conscious leadership
join us for an episode filled of practical wisdom
for leading a fulfilled life
and now meet our inspired guest
Kagan Gupta
who's on the mission to inspire 10,000 individuals
to reach their full potential
Kagan excited to have you here
pleasure to be here
thank you so much for inviting me aren't you
my pleasure as well
and just for listeners
where in the world are you
I'm in Melbourne
Australia so
the other end of the world than you
I love that
I love the entrepreneurship
connects people all around the world
and your story is also amazing
because you are no stranger to life changes and pivots
so can you tell our listeners a little bit about
the different curvatures you've made
and what inspires you right now
sure so um as Anya said
um Dugan Gupta Anya
my story started um
my career started when I came to Australia in 2,003
to do my master's NBA
in finance and after I finished my study I
um looked for work and I got a sales job
and in two months I got promoted
that's when I found out my love for sales silly
and then 21 years
fast forward and seven promotions later
I find myself as a senior executive um
taking businesses from $50 million
to half a billion dollars in operations
managing people across different countries
not only just different states
and then um
we talked about changes
and then something hit me in 2,018
where I felt a lot of shame
guilt and fear
but I didn't know
where it is coming from right
and it left a void in my
in my heart
so it kept it kept increasing
and what started happening is
I started picking up fights
for no reason I didn't realise it at the time
now I do and then until in 20
I think in um
at the end of 2020 or early 2021
I left my job and uh
in search for more money
because I thought money would make you happier
so um I got a very big role and I left my job
and the new job had the same set of problems right
surprise surprise
in six months I left the job as well and never
ever in my life have I worked under three years
at any role
check my LinkedIn
it's a minimum two and a/2
3 years but that role
because I was feeling something is missing
I resigned in 6 months
and then again a new role
better role
more money and I thought okay
well this time it's gonna be all good
all great more money
so that happened for the best
and then the same thing happened only worse
and this time the company folded
and the worst part is
I called out four people
four friends of mine who had families with little kids
who were in secure jobs
and I called them out to come and work for me
with this great company
with this um
uh new company a startup
even though they had seven other established businesses
this particular company under that larger umbrella
was a new start
and within two weeks of me hiring these four people
and I've been in this role for three months myself only
right actually
not six months
just three months
and within two to four weeks of hiring
all these four people
the company falls
wow and the CEO rang me
with the chief operations officer to say
can you ring all these four people
and tell them that they don't have a job anymore wow
I tell you what Anya
I could have handled myself
but when you talk about responsibility
of other people losing their income because of you
it's beyond gut wrenching
even talking about it now makes my spine shiver right
um and to deliver that news
when two of them were close friends
I lost friendship over this
as a result I went into depression
um anxiousness came first
then depression and then I even had suicidal attempts
4 on four different occasions wow
so it was a deep
deep deep uh
and dark time in my life
so that's what happened
and then to finish um
answering a question and closing the loop on that one
I then found someone through someone
someone came into my life for five minutes and said hey
have you spoken to this person
and then that's how
my personal development journey restarted
and I remembered that when I was 13 years of age
I was reading spiritual books
I was doing yoga
I was a yoga teacher
I was teaching numerology astrology
palmistry to myself
reading books
and I used to read
all the personal development books at the time Jim Ron
Zig Ziggler
Brian Tracy
even the Stoics
Marcus Aurelius
you name it
and I was reading it
but I just forgotten
and not just forgotten
for a few weeks or a few months or a few years
I had forgotten that I was a peeny junkie
for a good 30 years
and it all came back to me a year and a half ago
when I was um
battling my depression
and then I found this program
one program LED to another program
and it LED to the self realisation
that the void I've been feeling
is because I need to serve others more powerfully
therefore I took the part of coaching and I became
um thankfully
to the person who coached me for my first program
the one after depression
I started coaching her program
as in teaching others that program
and then that LED me into my own one on one coaching
and I became a executive career coach
given my own executive background
and then I became a business coach
and right now
I'm helping both corporates and senior executives
to get abundance and reignite their passion
that's my story in a nutshell wow
I am so touched by just the depth of the experience
you had to go through
and thank you for
authentically showing the low points of that as well
and it's amazing how you were able to reflect
and find this connection with yourself again
and find a purpose
to help others throughout this darkness
I'm curious
what were some of the big takeaways that you have now
looking back
you know like
what were some signs that
like something was missing
and if somebody is maybe starting to see
these signs within themselves
what advice would you give them in the
instead of trying to find more money
like what would be actually help them to um
have a more productive way of dealing with these things
if you could give them advice
I would say
the first thing that jumped up to me right now
Anya as you were talking and asking that question is
listen to yourself and listen to your body
you know I'm gonna be a little bit vulnerable over here
this is something I realised literally yesterday
and you and your viewers are going to be
the second people on the planet to find this out
and the first thing is you um
really really really need to listen to yourself
for me my body was asking for a break
now get this
I mean I'm just keeping it real right
I not take a break between 2003 and 2,021
except one holiday and I didn't even realise that
2nd of August 2,013
I went to see my brother in London and I went to
um Barcelona
Spain Paris
London and that was a three week holiday
except that holiday
I went to India a couple of times
but that was for work purposes
and I just utilized my weekends to meet my family
however a proper proper holiday
one three week holiday in 20 years
wow you gotta yourself
you gotta listen
I was just working
working working right
and we all have some shame
guilt of fear that stored in us
either through childhood experiences
or even some experiences that we feel
or experience as adults
which I never processed
I'm gonna share one of them with you
with your permission
of course of course
and this is me being completely
vulnerable in a public forum
something I realised just yesterday in fact
a couple of days ago
I was brushing my teeth and it hit me like a rock
for the last six months I've been feeling some shame
guilt and fear
but I didn't know what it was
it's a mental block right and
I need to do something to grow my business
but I've been procrastinating surprise
surprise right
and I didn't know for that particular aspect
and I didn't know what it is
and I've been journaling
I've been listening to myself
I've been taking breaks and um
just walking in nature
just just the things I love
and it's to say that there's no guarantee that would
your block is will come to you in one day or one week
or one year or one month
you just gotta keep at it for me
it came in my month seven so
and the shame and guilt was when my mother visited me
when I just came to Australia in February of 2003
and she visited me in July of 2003
to spend her time with me because it was my birthday
for all the wrong reasons
I did not spend enough time with her in fact
I asked friends to spend time with her and take a place
I could have taken her
I could have spent time with her but I didn't
I'm not gonna go into the reasons why or how
because that's all um separate detail however
the important thing is the shame and guilt
was that I just didn't spend enough time with her
so that hit me like a rock and yeah
that the the feeling
and you know
when I when I think about it
that feeling used to come every month
every week every year
I just didn't think too much of it
it just came and went cause I was so busy doing stuff
but it's just goes to show that when for sure
when you actually process your emotions properly
and I processed it yesterday
so I've I actually have a forgiveness coach
so I have a um
I have a coach for myself
one on one coach and a group coach to help me grow
because I think that coaches who believe in coaching
others need to have a coach themselves otherwise
you basically saying I don't believe in coaching
right so um
I got a couple of coaches
but I also have a forgiveness coach
who actually teaches me how to forgive yourself
hmm how to forgive yourself
this is key three things
and this is how I process my emotion yesterday
how to forgive yourself
how to forgive the other person in your mind
even if there was nothing to forgive
but if you think their fault
you need to forgive them in your mind
because your mind needs to believe
that you've forgiven them
and the third thing is you need to give them permission
to forgive you
hmm and I process this yesterday
and can I just share with you Anya
I felt the biggest aha
or the biggest ha
relief ever felt in my life
and then what followed was two hours of work
and I pumped out enough work in two hours
that I normally would do in a week wow
so we learning everyday and as I said before
you and your viewers are first to learn about the shame
guilt and fear in me
and I guess the fear is that uh
or the fear was that it will never be processed hmm
and I cannot express that feeling
except for saying it's like a
it's like 60 kilos of emotional baggage
getting released from your body right
in the form of balloons or
or whatever you can think about
whatever expression to make you feel better
but you feel so light after that
oh my god I've been storing that up
so 2,003 and now we're in 2024
for almost 21 years on here wow wow
appreciate you sharing that
not only because of
the vulnerability and importance of self election
but to me personally
it gives me hope to be transparent
I can so relate to so much of what you're saying
if we started our journeys
very similarly in terms of timeline
so again about seven months ago
and I still feel like this pinch in my back is actually
like right kind of in my back area
and it's energetic thing
so when I'm sitting down and that
I just feel that
and I can't quite get to what it's at
you know I'm giving it space
I'm asking what it wants
I'm like going outside and doing all the things
I don't think
and I'm still not quite there yet
and so I appreciate you giving me hope
it is there
I'm like forgiving everything and everybody
and loving everything haha
I'm not quite there yet
and that's okay
I think it takes time right
you have to honor the process
and being open to things coming
so thank you for giving me and hopefully our listeners
who maybe are having that sense of weightedness
the hope that hey
it will come in time
and there is this process of forgiveness for yourself
and for whatever needs to be forgiven and that
that what happens after that
a beautiful moment that you shared with us
as I said I just um
pumped out a lot of work
which I hadn't
I was procrastinating for a good six months
and I got a call from
so it's working on a workshop
we've done a couple of webinars together um
and we're working on a workshop
where there's nothing to buy
even if you wanted to
it's just giving value to Google
and yeah um
we and I and I'm not a copywriter
yeah I'm just not ha
I'm not a copywriter however
I I wrote a 6 email sequence
for people who are going to register for this workshop
for them to get emails
to nurture them
to share with them what the workshop is gonna be about
just to keep in touch
and um when my um
business coach turn sales coach friend read the email
he just left a voice note for me on WhatsApp saying
Kevin this is extraordinary
look at that
and he said to me
this is yesterday
and he said to me
can I actually use some of that copy
for my own website and my own
um collateral
I'm like sure
it's a collaborative effort
but I've never had anyone say to me
that you've written an extraordinary copy before now
I can't help put together the two instances together
because an emotional release
combined with me pumping out quality work
let's just say
I know it's only a very small sample of one person
but it still is because I greatly respect this person
he's authority in his field
he's got 15 years of experience
and he's telling me that
you wrote an extraordinary copy
and he's paying copywriters thousands of dollars
to write copy for his website and um
lead magnet and whatnot
and he's telling me
this copy is one of the best I've ever read
ever read you know
to me um it's
it's not a coincidence
because it just goes to show that when you work really
really free and in your element
then you can produce
even ordinary people can produce extraordinary stuff
you know I hope there was a question
that I answered it
yes can I add to that a I think everybody who is
does amazing things is extraordinary
they are all ordinary people who
who are embracing their fuller self
who are curious about their full potential
and that's really what makes them extraordinary
in the long run
would you have advice for anybody like me
who is sensing yes
I'm holding something
I'm sensing that tightness
what advice we give for them to
get to place like where you were yesterday
it's a great question
Anya and I actually written something down
I'm gonna read it
this is not only for you or the question you ask
this actually applies to everybody yeah
and I'm gonna say to your viewers if they pay attention
they might get something out of it um
this comes from a video
uh from all Nightingale
as we going back decades
and he said something to the tune of
the architect of the universe
didn't create a stairway leading nowhere
I'm gonna repeat that one more time
the architect of the universe
didn't create a stairway leading nowhere
even the Bible talks about this to yield
now the Bible says yield yourself to God
but for people who believe in higher power universe
I'm gonna say
if you're thinking of doing something
just do it and trust the higher power
the problem is we always overthink too much
we choose unhappiness or uncertainty
now what does that mean
it means that we are so comfortable with failure
because we know what it looks like most of us
I'm saying most of us are so comfortable with failure
because our mind
that has 65 million years of evolution tells us
to remain safe
remain safe means doing what we do or what we know
but that also means not trying new things
which also means that you're never gonna try something
you're uncertain at
which means that failure is guaranteed
so is unhappiness
so we choose fear of failure over fear of uncertainty
and self doubt whispers uncertainty
and it creates um in the moment
what looks less frightening is to choose unhappiness
meaning let's not do anything
hmm and it causes paralysis
and paralysis means it's guaranteed failure
all of this means you might as well give it a shot
and try because you will succeed
I was conducting a session with the group
couple of weeks ago
uh Anya and someone asked me a question
and I just put it back to them
I said if you were me
how would you answer
and they said
I'm not a coach
I'm not conducting decision
I don't know
I said okay
why don't you try the question you just asked me
if you were to answer or try answering the question
and believe me Anya
everybody was just stumped because he gave a
five minute response that he even didn't believe
he just gave or recorded
and I didn't ask the audience
the other five people I asked
what do you think of his response
and they were gobsmacked
they had to pick up their jaw from the ground
this guy didn't believe himself
hey and I knew it beforehand
and that's why I said to him
do you mind attempting to answer that question yourself
and then magic happen
and that's what happens when you try
so you've heard the story of 7 up the drink
no okay so I know a drink
everyone knows a drink but yeah
how did it get the name 7 up
now this chemist or physicist
who was trying to create a formula to um
uh get to a formula
something like Coca Cola
but he failed the first 6 times
so he got um
demotivated
and he actually sold the formula to another company
and this company called their physicist and said
let's try one more time to get the formula right
and they did seven attempts seven up
it went up overnight
it was a success right
so that story goes to show that you're usually five
minutes away from success when you give up
so do not give up
trust the universe
that's my own story
my first 9 months in coaching
there was zero income
I was quite shameful of that to admit
but not anymore because everything takes time
and in that nine months
everyone around me kept saying
go back to your full time job
go back to your full time job
find someone's something stable and guess what
I followed my intuition and now I'm a six figure coach
hmm in a very small amount of time
from what I've been told
right right
if I had listened to them
I wouldn't have pursued my my passion
this was the void that was following me in 2,018
so going back to your viewers
and you answering your question is just go for it
just do it listen to your heart
our bodies and our minds are talking to us all the time
I proved it to a client once and he said to me
I wanna die
I said okay
hold your nose and make
make sure your mouth is your lips are sealed yeah
seven seconds
I know after seven seconds he went like yeah
right the body wants to live right
the body wants to live
listen to your body and listen to your heart
it's guiding you all the time
we just need to list the other thing I've list
I've written down and this is uh
closing the loop on your
on your question that you asked me uh
the advice for you this
this six steps I follow yeah
the first step is define your goal
be very clear
for example
be very clear about what you wanna achieve in 2024
do not worry if you can achieve it or not
because if you're worrying
I'm gonna explain the science behind
if you got a minute
if you're worrying
what you're saying is
I'm gonna fail
and if you say I'm gonna fail
are you living in the present
or are you living in the future
future uh huh
so when you're living in the future
how can you achieve anything in the present
hmm so that's why all this talk about being the now
being the now
I'm explaining that at a deeper level
right people say
I'm gonna fail
or I don't know if I was successful
but what you gotta think about is
you're placing yourself in the future
you are transporting or teleprompting
yourself into the future and saying something
you don't even know it's gonna happen
because we're not God yeah
we're not a high power
we're not the universe
but in doing that
you think you are
and you place an
outcome in your mind that hasn't happened
you bring that outcome into your present
you repeat that outcome to yourself over
and over and over again
until that person's reality changes
therefore their personality changes
so we need to define a goal now
do not worry about whether you gonna hit it
and you might as well aim for big
I had a client last year
uh we wrote down a figure she would achieve in 2023
and this is on January 11th
I keep extensive notes on January 11th, 2023
Anya we wrote a figure she's gonna achieve
and I said at percent
I should have said go double but I said at 20%
we just spoke last week
uh and on January 11th, 2024
she released the figure she achieved in 2023
and the figure was $3,000 US
more than the figure of your wow
at the time when we wrote the figure
we had no idea how we were gonna achieve it right
so define your goal
there is magic in writing
the second thing I will say is
quit running yourself down
stop cutting your own legs
right I'm not saying stop all the negative thoughts
because we can't
there's 60 to 70,000 thoughts a day
most of the negative
I'm just saying do not let it get to you because
you know how someone says to you
you're a naughty girl and you're having a bitch
but that stays with you for a lie yeah
the program
I'm telling you that I started my coaching career with
teaching others
that's my coaches comment that she had from her teacher
and that lived with her for 40 years until she
until she created this program
so she first healed herself
and now she's healing the world
but that's just telling you how childhood trauma
plays in her mind
even that's just a sentence
now that teacher wouldn't even remember
but she's played that sentence in her mind for 40 years
Anya right so you gotta quit running yourself down
the third step is stop thinking of all the reasons
you cannot be successful
and start thinking about the all the reasons you can be
so everyone knows Tony Robbins
his life changes is on YouTube
his life change when he went from
I can't do it
I can't afford it to how can I
it's a simple change of question
the fourth step is go back to your childhood
and think about when was the first time you felt shame
guilt or fear
feel the emotion
you know we all heard of Bill Gates
but few people have heard of Paul Allen
Paul Allen coached a guy named
we gonna call him uh John
cause I don't wanna read identity
so Paul Allen
a billionaire who founded Microsoft
Gates coached Paul um
uh coached this called guy we gonna call John
and I had one session in January of last year
with this guy John
he shared with me Paul Allen's trick
every morning
Paul Allen wakes up and says
I'm gonna do this thing I fear the most
bring me the biggest and the baddest challenge
and let's tackle that head on
what do we do
normally we run away right
and what happens
the fear multiplies
all the things we've just discussed
it multiplies
and it stores in our body and our mind and our heart
and that's the wise that keeps telling us be safe
don't do anything right
but if you face your fear
you're literally maybe
minutes or hours away from a breakthrough
that's what happened to me yesterday
I processed my emotions
I had a choice
when I shared that story with you about my mother
I had a choice yesterday of not processing my emotions
and again just ignoring them and moving on
what do you think happened
they'd still be locked up
the more we think we're in control and ignoring
the more we're actually bottling
we're not really controlling it
we're just bottling up
so it's like ah
be there for eating for you
yeah right yeah
that's that's fine um
step No. 5 is
write the description of the person you want to become
I cannot stress how important this is
I wrote down 18 months ago the kind of person I become
every night before I go to sleep
I ask myself
am I becoming that person
how closer am I
what are the things I did today
that brought me being closer to that person
and what are the things that I shouldn't be repeating
because they took me away from being that person
and the last step is
act being that person everyday
so I'm just gonna quickly repeat all the six steps
for your viewers
and yeah and and um
hopefully this answers your question
the first is define your goal
second step is quit running yourself down
the third step is stop thinking about all the reasons
you cannot be successful
and start thinking about all the reasons you can be
this also means you just write down
all your accomplishments so far
because we keep thinking about what we can do
how about you keep a list of what you've done so far
which is great
No. 4 hit No. 4 is childhood trauma or beliefs
that have caused you to feel shame
guilt or fear
go back in time and remember what it was
and process those emotions feel them
express them
write them down
No.5 is write a description of the person
you wanna become
and the sixth is act
being that person everyday
so beautiful
when you were saying this
I sense this in my heart
a little bit of this fear creeping like oh
and it's so interesting because I
I truly believe on this entrepreneur journey
there's more fear around our higher potential
then about being safe like we
we feel very comfortable being complacent or being
you know where we are
but when we really
imagine that we can have this potential
it's the fear is holding us back
and says ego that
again when when we truly uncover ourselves
we have to face our ego
we have to face like all these fears and realize that
um they're not they're more illusion
myth than reality
and so to your point
a lot of times we avoid fear
or even I think there's this opposite side of it
you know just you know
don't worry about it
you know fake it till you make it
but I think you have to go through the fear to
your point we can't just bubble it up um
it's not a path around it
it's a path through it that leads to that healing
and along this path
you know that we talked about
describing the
the way you wanna be being that person how
how what excuse me
what advice would you give to people around
being able to trust
that that transformation is possible
you guys a lot of times
I guess something I
I struggle with everyday and I lean into it
as I was mentioning
that trusting that decision of myself
this grander self
this big aspiration is real
and it's not just a thing of imagine
imagination
it's not again
my grand ego sick oh
sure you can be this big person
change in the world sure
who are you
um and I have to check myself and reconnect with myself
and look back at all the examples of like
where positive things
turned out better than I ever anticipated you know
so there is like this trusting universe
but what advice we give for people
who are similar like me
struggling with this element of trust in
your higher potential
sure how about I do one better and give you proof
onion love it
so I'm gonna put you in a situation where
you will answer this question
yeah right um
go back to when you were a child
right or maybe this
have you have you seen a toddler trying to walk
I have two kids so yes
I am very well
there you go
so you have kids
so and how old are they
um about 18 months and 4 four and a half
so I'm assuming the four and a half on walks
at 18 months is still 20
yes they're
they're both walking
they're both walking
yep walking
so go back to the time of the 18 months um
what what what are their names please
Nikolai is the 18 month old
and Russlan is the four and a half year old
so when Nikolai was uh
and I'm only
guessing when Nikolai was 10 or 12 months old
and trying to work
um you know
did Nikolai ever come to you and said mum
I've tried 30 times
or 30,000 times in the last three months
I can't walk
I'm giving up
no no no just keeps at it
keeps at it hey
so now you might argue and in good faith
being the devil's advocate
now you might say govern their child and their pure
you know but when we become adults we
we think differently
so I'm gonna say okay
let's just park that example
but we do have one example of persistence
that's how we learn walk
we do not give up right
yeah we crawl we fall you know
on average this is confirmed fact on average
a child will fall about hundred to 300 times a day
that's so a 90,000 times over
a nine month period
if that's how long a child takes to walk
you can divide that by three
30,000 times in three months Anya
they they just keep walking
that's proof number one
and like I said
you might argue they're young and they are you know
they're sponsored
they don't know
they don't know anything about
your shame of Field Coven
what are you talking about
so here's example number two
do you drive
oh I do mm hmm
so go back to day No. 1 when you were driving
do were you perfect
or day No. 1
no parking lot
uh no uh huh and um
how long have you been driving for now
um 17 years
mhm so the level of confidence you have now in driving
did you had that on day one
no now I'm not gonna ask you how old were you
but it's fascinating right
I'm gonna assume you were
you were an adult when you started driving on day one
however you chose uncertainty or unhappiness
hmm I want you any viewers to think about this Anya
we're going real deep real quick
your mind when you were driving chose
uncertainty or unhappiness
unhappiness means that if you didn't drive
guaranteed unhappiness
guaranteed failure because you wouldn't be able to do
all the things that you were doing while driving right
how we tracking you with me so far on it
yeah now I'm just keeping it real
very real an example
everybody will understand
you chose uncertainty because on Day 1
you had no certainty how you gonna drive on Day 2 right
so far right
on Day 2 you had no certainty on how you gonna drive on
Day 3 right
now I can tell you on day one
if you could feel how you could feel in year 17
you would learn to drive way way quicker
I've just given you a secret formula
now that's example No. 2
for for you and for people who swim same story
right and we are adults like okay
you can argue we are young when we learn to swim
and you can argue with toddler when we learning to walk
but you can't argue with the fact that we
all learn to drive when we are full grown adults right
it means we can choose
uncertain uncertainty or unhappiness
we just choose not to
we allow the fear to get to us
and the reason
the fear gets to us is because we don't take action
we don't take action because as I said before
when we choose a fear of failure
it causes certain paralysis
and paralysis leads to keeping us safe
and our mind says don't do anything
you're safe over here
that also means you're not learning anything
if you listen to your mind at the time
there are people in the world
who haven't Learned driving because of this
right very few
but there are people who haven't learnt to drive
because they told themselves they
couldn't drive because it's difficult
if you tell your mind something over
and over and over again
it'll start to believe you on you
so when I was sharing that example of driving
if people can feel
how the end product would look like
let's talk about me okay
I'm gonna throw some numbers over there
if I wanna earn $1.2 million net
AUD Australian dollars surprise
surprise in 2024
and if I can feel how it looks today
not then today
the problem is we tell ourselves
I'll be happy when I'll be happy when I lose 10 kilos
I'll be happy when I pay my mortgage off
I'll be happy when I get married
I'll be happy when I
I'll be happy when I have two kids right
I'm telling people
how about if you enjoy the journey in the moment
where you are right now right
we go back to step No. 6
acting the person you wanna become
almost every person when they write step No. 5
which is the person they wanna become
they'll be things like I wanna be loyal
I wanna be honest
I wanna be rich
I wanna be I wanna have more time
I wanna have better relationships
most of them will have that
how do I know
of course more than 150 people
right the thing is when you're trying to feel that way
you're happy in the moment not I'll be happy when
right and that's the problem
we take ourselves into the future
and here's a question to remain
here's here's a step here's a
formula for you to help remain in the present
you simply ask yourself
am I in the present
or am I going into the future
and fabricating something that doesn't exist
I tell you what Anya
no one no one has ever come back to me and said
that question didn't work
and I'm gonna be honest
I'm only two years into coaching
it's my 19th month
but after having coached more than 100 people
no one has come back to me and said
the question did work because when you ask yourself
am I in this present moment now
or am I fabricating a result that doesn't didn't happen
the answer is always gonna be I'm fabricating something
so if I tell myself I'm gonna earn $1.2 million
but my mind is saying
hey you can't
The Yukon Potion is how do you know right
you don't right
what if I have a joint venture
with a big firm and they give me a coaching gig
so so big that that's a loan it worth $1 million
I don't know right
what if what if I find a marketing company
that spreads my message like wildfire
the rest is gonna be history right right
I just don't know
and here's an example for you and your viewers
and this is gonna sound silly
but have you ever gone to a coffee shop
and order coffee
of course Seattle or Seattle area
we run on coffee yeah
well I'm taking coffee example
because Melbourne is a coffee capital of Australia
arguably the world
we get one of the best coffees here
when you go and order a coffee
what happens Anya
you pay right
you pay right
some places you pay later
but mostly you pay upfront
and then you sit down
and my question to you and your viewers is
do you ever doubt
the coffee is gonna land on your table ever
no no why is that
what if the chef has a heart attack god forbid
what if there's an earth
what if the seal chef and the chef have a fire
what if the coffee machine breaks out
in 5 seconds
I give you five examples right
all of this can happen
fact it has happened
in Melbourne
three months ago
there were three quakes and people were having coffee
they all left right
in some cases before the coffee arrived
but we don't think about this do we
no we expect
we feel the coffee will arrive
that's the belief
so going back to your question about guggin
how do we believe
how do we believe this is gonna happen
is simply believe in whatever you want to happen
believe it's gonna happen
because what's the alternative
you've been trying the alternative for 50 40
20 30 years and look what's happened
you are where you are
right right
and I mean it with a lot of love and compassion
for your viewers
no disrespect meant
but I'm just keeping it real
and now I'm gonna tell you the reason why this happened
two reason we stay in our comfort zone
and the second thing
which Brian Tracy explains is the best in the world
is Learned helplessness yes
yes we have Learned to become helpless
and don't even get me started on the school system
and education system
which doesn't cover any of this
it doesn't cover about emotions
all we are taught is go get a job
get a mortgage paid off right
you'll be happy
what happens
we get a mortgage and we are unhappy
because we keep thinking about
where we're not gonna pay the damn thing
right right
yeah so we talked about why it happens
Learned helplessness and comfort zone
we talked about how do you believe is
follow the six steps
write it down
tell your mind it's gonna happen
believe it's gonna happen
feel and when you feel
I guarantee you
if you really feel
the outcome of what you want December 2024 to look like
and for your viewers
if you really
really really feel it Anya
your body language will change
the clothes you wear will change
the way you talk will change
the way you walk will change right
I'm talking about 3
60 transformation
if you feel it
50% some of the things will change
and I've given you an examples
that we go to a coffee shop
we expect the coffee to arrive
we don't even like
it's like almost like demanding
right right
so I can um
can I share again a quick story with you
of course of course
and then we wrap up this question
this is something I realise recently
because I keep journalling
I keep journalling
I keep journalling and
when I was 20 years of age
I decided I'm gonna go abroad
so I was in India
and I decided I'm gonna go abroad to study
my parents said to me unequivocally like ball
idlex caps everything underline
they said you will not go
because we do not have the money to send you hmm
cause I was from a lower middle class
right and um
talk about sadness
frustration anger
however for some reason
and maybe because I was doing yoga at the time
I was big on spirituality uh
which I forgot all about when I came to Australia and
got busy with the corporate world but going back uh
for some reason I kept trying
hmm trying and I kept trying
now I never expected my parents to help me
but I expected someone to help me
I expected the universe to help me for some reason this
this higher power
and I kept trying
and I kept going from one hotel to another
because all these universities from Australia
and Geneva and uh
a US and France
they were coming to the new Delhi
uh capital of India where I was
and they kept doing their presentations in
in the big hotels
I kept from one hotel to another
after nine months
my mum came to me and said the magic words
she said what do you need oh
no I never thought about it
until couple of months ago when it hit me right
this is why you should listen to your body
and your mind and journal
and I think
I know what happened is because I didn't give up right
and I was sort of expecting this to happen
I didn't say by who
that's the thing we do
now this the law of separation
I teach laws in a separate group
there's 52 law
spiritual business success
one of the laws is law of separation
it talks about whatever your vision is in my case
my vision was to go abroad and do my NBA abroad
overseas and my strategy
my first strategy was to go to my parents
that failed miserably
I didn't even know what my second
third fourth strategy is
I just believed there is a strategy
that's why I kept going
and after nine months
maybe maybe my parents saw my
my persistence and my mother convinced my father
and one thing LED to another
and I landed in Australia
a year and a half later after that
incredible so it's full circle answering your question
how do you believe
just get started babe
do not get stuck on the strategy you know
if you talk about if you go back to the 7 up physicist
the guy who didn't make it in six attempts
he was stuck on a strategy right yeah
the 7 company were looking at the vision
and they got it well
you can call it lucky they got it
but you gotta look at your vision
your strategy can change right
but your vision should remain the same
and you just need to believe
write down and just believe
because the alternative is if you don't
you never gonna get there
and can I share a little bit of my story
so as you know
I started this podcast
cause I got a lot of laid off from meta
and I was like
this is my sign to not hold back
and the podcast started and the first day started
dear reviews right
here I am brand new podcast
um working like whole month I did it
you know on my own
nobody watched
and I record like 10 hours before that of it
five podcasts
nobody watched
and that gives us like
this is what that was a reference by like
is this still worthwhile to me as a meaningful enough
and it was and I continued
and now we are six months in
and we have almost 70 episodes
we interview people around the world
I nominate my podcast for two global
awards and podcasting
which you know
but I'm like
I'm gonna go for it and I
a nominated my name to be speaking
at a podcasting conference
this is me like five months into podcasting
not perfectly by myself
and I got selected
over 600 people applied
and I got selected to do a speech
this is my first public speech haha
um and I'm interviewing to do a Tedx talk on Friday
on Friday because again
I just went for it
and I still have those doubts
to be transparent with you
but I also am leaning in
like I'm at this point of a night
mentioned to you before we start of like
you know when you are just walking
and you rock forward like
I can do everything
the world is my oyster
and then there's like this fear that's like
are you sure
are you sure
and this time
I'm like leaning in as far as possible nope
this is my reality
because I see it in other people
because I dream big
my big dream
can I share with you my big dreams
of course yes
please let's do this right
my big dream
is to obviously grow the podcast Facebook
it's bigger
I wanna create this community of purposeful
entrepreneurs around the world
and I'm working with my partner Earl Talo
we're creating retreats
we're getting our first retreat in June
which is crazy fast right
it's crazy fast
but this vision I have is a
the connections with people around the world
like the purposeful entrepreneurs
that connect together
inspire those supports
like there's magic in that
there's magic in people
who are doing good work in the world
who want to grow
who inspire and motivate each other
so I will have this vision that
not just create a retreat
but create a community
and create a global experience for your
traveling the world
and here you have entrepreneurs
like going in small experiences
connecting offline between the retreats
and then we have like this retreat Empire
right ha ha ha
go over to Empire
and then we're training people
like all the people that wanted
a lot of incredible coaches wanna
create retreats
so I'm gonna train people how to create retreats
and around I'm gonna have the podcast
which connects
inspires entrepreneurs
like that is my vision
like doing all of this
and seeing this beautiful power of connection
and creating this amazing experience
people to like inspire themselves
inspire others to educate themselves
educate others
and like experience the world throughout
throughout this whole community
and experience
so that's my big dream
and here I am
having nothing really to show for it
I have no real experience
like that's what's driving me
that's what's calling me
I see myself speaking
daily at this huge stage
like I see the lights
I see the audience
I see the faces
having them zero speeches right now um
but that's me being very mole
but I feel like a little bit emotional just saying that
but yeah that's what I see in my life
and I don't have any proof of it
but I'm leaning into that
if you if you keep believing it's gonna happen on you
I I strongly believe that someone
was looking over me when I was 21
or 20 when this was happening
and someone just wanted to see me persist
because the lesson is to have the courage to keep going
because courage is not the absence of fear
it's not me
courage is doing the things that are necessary
despite the presence of fear right
you allowed to feel fear
you allowed to be scared
that's why we have to feel the emotions
but just do not let it get to you
it's very easy to say
I know and I fail at this several times a week right
but I feel good about it because it used to be
several times a minute for me babe right
so you gotta look at how far you've come
cause when you compare yourself to others
you are actually damaging your own reputation
in your mind
comparison and judgement
are the biggest demotivators in the world
like they will just take you back years or decades
so going back to you
I just wanna say congratulations and well done
on believing in yourself
and believing things can be done at a grand scale
cause you might as well yeah
we get one life right
and you following your passion and you can feel
I'm pretty sure the viewers can feel the
energy in your voice even when you were sharing that
so good on you
that's fantastic
thank you you you gave me the confidence to share that
and I want to also just wrap up
feel free to add anything you missed
how has your life changed
you shared example where here you were
on a career path where every opportunity was you know
more money you know
more of the quote unquote
success that everybody looks for
but yet it wasn't fulfilling you like no
so what has changed in the way you
you approach success in this pursuit
now that you're doing it
you know as a coach
how are the two guys different for you
so an example comes to mind
my recent client came to me and said
Gugan I was gonna commit suicide six months ago
but I'm not going to anymore
and he said you are the reason
if that's not a big enough reason for me to keep going
I don't know what is because when I had my own suicidal
attempts and depression in early 2021
you know my aim became to save one gugan at a time
and now I can confidently say I've saved one
I'm not gonna say I've saved many
but I saved one
but when I heard those words
what do you think happened Anya
can that ever happen in a corporate job
hmm you can make a difference
but I don't believe you can change lives
unless you are in that line
like me working for a electricity company
or a telephone company
I don't think I can change lives the way I am now
right so when you hear those
and this is the
the complete end of the spectrum
like an extreme end of the spectrum
the other spectrum is that um
I don't love my life anymore
I don't feel like waking up
I feel like hitting the snooze
button 20 times before I wake up
these are real issues
when these people who come to me and 3
6 months later they say I've just got a promotion
I can't wait to jump up
I'm full of energy when you hear those things on you
that's my own belief now
rewarding me after a year and a half and saying
thank God that you kept going
guggen thank God
so it gives me the biggest ever job satisfaction
that can be like beyond words could explain
I I guess I want people to understand like
what happens when you pursue traditional path of like
that success and money right
like there's an end point where it just feels
like you're saying like
it wasn't enough
there was something missing in it
and here you are doing something different
because you redefined success
so I'm curious
like how did you find
how did you find success then let's say
and why was it not working
and how do you find success now
I believe because I was meant for something higher
and yeah you know
as I said to you before
you need to listen to your body
your mind and your heart
and something was telling me
go and change your career
go and look for a different path
now I didn't know at the time
but the universe of God
created the different path for me by design
it gave me an opportunity to do it by choice
and I didn't right
I didn't I didn't listen
maybe at the time I I could have taken a break
a holiday cleared my mind journalled
maybe I could have realised this sooner
the universe created that part for me
so I had no choice
I had to take that that part
and now I realise what a powerful part it is
now at the time success for me was money fame
title authority
right now success for me is how powerfully
can I be of service
to the person who's sitting in front
doesn't matter if they were true
for example
right now my only and only aim is
how can I be present 100% for Anya and your viewers
I'm not making it up
that's the person I've become
it wasn't always like that
it's very hard
because when you're talking to someone
you have 50 things going in your back in your head
what are we gonna do after this
where the groceries gonna come from
and where's my next client gonna come from
what about my next meeting
am I gonna be late
what am I wearing
am I looking okay
am I smelling good
you know you smell great
so we we we have so many thoughts you know
we talk about 60 thoughts a day
so one thing I've developed is for me
the success
for me success is serving others as powerfully as I can
and leaving the rest of a high universe
you talk about belief I do it everyday every hour
so I'm still not sure if I've answered
your questions correctly ha ha uh
but I'm hoping I have otherwise
feel free to ask again
you're good
I I didn't I didn't have a clearer tickle in my head
so I think that the message
they came across is exactly what I was looking for
so thank you for uncovering it with me together
and I know you've been
you've been so generous for time
I love just everything about conversation
I didn't expect where it was gonna go
but you so bully
you beautifully guided us through a framework
through your own story
through inspiration
through your personal transformation
and I believe all of our listeners could
gather something and relate you know
some part of their journey
you know where are they blocked
where are they fearing
what can they do
you know especially now we're starting a New Year
a great time to reflect like hey
where's my life at right now
is it how I want to live
and how can I start living that in the now
like what I want
um can I start emboding that right now
and let's see what happens you know
here we are
it's gonna come out the 6th of February
start doing these six steps
and let us know
you know what those look like
what is the future you
that you're gonna body now look like
and let us know in a year
uh how the transformation took place
and you were delightful here
right off track
we wrap up with three rapid fire questions
so let me know when you're ready and I will
shoot this away
let's go okay
oh one sec um
what is one
book that you would recommend to all entrepreneurs
and this is it okay
there's two actually come to mind
but I'll I'll say the first one uh
my favourite topic is courage
so it's gotta be obstacle is the way by Ryan Holiday
I'm very jealous of Ryan Holiday because he was
all of 43 years of age when he wrote that book
No. 1 bestseller
I don't know how many
the languages it's been written in um
amazing book
so it's um for all ages and for all entrepreneurs
no matter what you do
amazing book obstacle is the way by Ryan Holiday
um is there
do you have a favourite journaling practice
that you would recommend to others um yes
it's called morning journal pages by Julia Cameron
so you can just Google it
Julia Cameron
morning journal pages
and it's an amazing practice to get your junk out
when I say junk
I mean all the negative top
because we have them all day long
but if you actually write it down and get them out
first thing in the morning
after your spiritual practices or your gym
or whatever your personal success routine is
then you will find you have a far better productive day
as compared to not doing it test it
I love that
so beautiful
so actual and finally
in the positive sense
going off track is
the answer to that would be to
do the thing that's necessary
have the courage to go and do
the thing you fear the most
despite the presence of fear
and I can almost say guarantee your challenge
that you probably ending up surprising yourself
just do it just don't
don't trust me
and I say to all my clients and all my
and all my groups
do not trust whatever I say test it
belief is based on hearing other people
but knowing only comes to action
so I encourage you
just take Gagan's words
what are you fearing right now
and I'm asking myself right now
the same thing
what can I do today to take action
something I fear right now
and I hope that you listen to this
you also take those steps
and make this the best year yet
and see what you can fully
like see where your life will take you
when you start living outside your comfort zone
and going off track again
thank you so much for this fantastic interview
I Learned so much
my heart was pounding with fear
but excitement
every word that was listened to you
and to all the listeners
I'm excited to hear what you took away Sheriff us
your insights
your dreams
your aspirations
your fears that you're tackling
and as always
let's take over the world together
right off track
thank you for joining us again
it was a pleasure
I loved it thank you so much thank you